I just finished a book by Pauline Boss, PhD titled "Loss, Trauma, and Resilience." A retired University of Minnesota professor, Dr. Boss coined the term "ambiguous loss." What is it? It is a loss without a body and without a death certificate, as with the 9/11 victims. According to Boss, ambiguous loss is the most stressful of losses and "blocks cognition, coping, and meaning-making and freezes the grief process." You may suffer from ambiguous loss if the person who died changed drastically in recent years or if family members shun you at the memorial service. Do you think you're suffering from ambiguous loss? If so, I encourage you to learn more about it. You will understand yourself better and cope better too.